Tuesday, June 30, 2009

The child in us.




The sweetness of little kids. No wonder Jesus wanted them brought to him. Kids are innocent, in everything they do. The things they say, or do to embarrass us, sure makes life interesting. The little ones notice everything, the white puffy clouds, the yellow dandelions, the moon coming out early in the summer time, the squirrels jumping on the tree branches. As adults we tend to get too busy to notice the beauty around us.

The other day my almost 5 year old was in the bathroom and I was nursing the little one to sleep, I heard her yelling, "Help, Help, Assistance needed!" It was the first time she said those words, made me worried, what have happened? I quickly left the baby and run into the bathroom, "What happened?" I asked her, "There is a spider on the wall!!!", oh my, I thought she fell from the toilet, or into it?!

My two year old is so lovable.... she likes to kiss, hug, and cuddle. She loves to be held in my arms, and loves to help me wash dishes, with the water dripping all over the kitchen floor...:) The other day she told me she was dreaming about angels... do you think its possible? With their innocent hearts, I believe everything is possible.

My 5 month old is a sweet baby. She grabs a hold of my shirt to hold on to me, and touches my face as she nurses. The way she smiles and laughs brings joy to my heart, even when its only 6 AM.

Jesus wants us to be like children as well, innocent and ready to forgive. To be able to notice the beauty around us, and thank the Creator for it.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

A prayer...


Dear Lord,

Help me to be a good, faithful friend to those in need. Help me see what others are going through and not be blind only by my needs. Give me wisdom in what to say to someone who is going through a though time in her faith, help her not fall from You in her faith, not to get deceived by certain books that twist the meaning of the bible. Give me words to encourage my husband not to give up, when he gets tired in his daily walk with the Lord, and all his struggles. Let me experience the moments with my children, to use them to teach, to love and to guide them, and not waste a single precious moment. Show me your way...help me not to stumble.. light my lantern, fill me with the holy spirit, let me shine for others, so I can bring praise to your name.

Amen.

Summer...




What is summer to you?

Here it is very hot, and to me summer is water, water, and more water. Today we got a heat wave passing through the city. Outside it is a smoldering, melting 108F... We took the kids to the lake earlier in the day, the water was warm near the shore, and only in the deeper parts it was colder.

How do people stay cool in this heat? Well, we drink lots of water, eat cold watermelon, and lots of ice cream. I try to cook only early in the morning or late evening, and during the day we eat sandwiches, salads, and lots of fruit.

To enjoy summer we do lots of fun things with the kids, take them to water parks, lakes, and rivers. Every season brings something special to us, so what does summer means to you?

Friday, June 26, 2009

My rest is in God alone...



Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, he is my fortress, I will not be shaken. My salvation and my honor depend on God, he is my mighty rock, my refuge. Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart to him, for God is our refuge.
Psalm 61: 5-8

ugly cancer

My friends husband was diagnosed with esophagus cancer in march of this year. He went through chemo and radiation, and got it to shrink in size. Yesterday they were going to do surgery to remove a part of esophagus and pull up his stomach and reconect it with the remaining esophagus. today I saw my friend she looked devasted, they coundnt do the surgery, the cancer spread. She started to cry, I started to cry... Oh, my Lord please help her. Please heal him, please provide a miracle. Now I am so- so sad. Its like the world ceases to exist, only my friend remains and her hubby... what else can I do?? I can be there for her.. I can help her in any way I can. Please pray for my friend, please come before the Lord and ask God to step in and help this family... thank you.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

I dont want to work....


Therefore the Lord waits to be gracious to you; therefore he exalts himself to show mercy to you. For the Lord is a God of justice; blessed are all those who wait for him. (Isaiah 30:18)

Constant praying, constant petition to God.
'Help me, please can you hear me. I need you. I am in a dark place now, my soul is troubled. When will I see the light, when will I hear your voice, I need you, please hold me. Jesus, will I ever be out of this darkness, where I can see the light, and praise you?'
God wants us to praise him even in our darkest hour. He wants us to raise our hands to him in our neediest time. The constant prayer does miracles. Its is alive. Like the smoke that rises from the fire all the way to the heavens, that is our prayer the constant adding of wood into the main fire, and the cry rises to heavens to God above. I know God hears my prayer, but someday it seams that the heavens are deaf. No one can help me, or understand me. My husband is not on my side. Only God is. And I need his guidance, his wisdom in how to survive, in how to live. How to be happy in the times of troubles, how to raise my children when I am working full time.

That is one of my biggest worries, my kids. I am not there for them, I am gone from early morning to late evenings, earning money for our family to survive, to have a health insurance and helping my husband financially. What if my kids grow up mother deprived, and resent me for it the rest of their life? My heart is with my kids and not my job. Everyday I wish to stay with my girls, to love them, to care for them, to be home with them. My heart is breaking into little pieces.
'God please heal my broken heart.' My comfort is that in heavens when we all go to be with Jesus, there will not be heartache, he will wipe away all our tears. Someday I feel like a broken record that keeps playing the same old song over and over. My husband is sick of hearing it. I am sick of hearing it. I just wish things were better and different. I should stop wishing and just pray more.:))

Monday, June 22, 2009

Oregon coast.

I like the ocean, there is just something majestic about it, something awesome. It is mesmerizing. I would be happy just to sit and stare at it all day long.







Isnt it just beautiful.... the amazing thing is that the ocean looks diferent in each state...

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Run away with me?


Do you feel like running away sometimes???

When we’re going through difficult times, it can be hard to see God at work in our life. Sometimes we begin to question whether He’s really paying attention to our prayers. Sometimes we begin to question if He even cares what we are going through.

If you’re going through a tough time in your life right now, I want to encourage you that God is hearing your prayers. He does care. And He really is there. You may even find that God is at work doing the most important work He’s ever done in your life. Keep looking up. Keep trusting in God to work things out for His glory. I am bad at looking up at God, when something troubling is happening in my life, I start to complain, I get upset, and I ask why do I have to endure this. Why does my life need these raging waters, my boat can barely stay afloat. Looking back at the storms in my life I am a bit ashamed of how I handled it, not so well... I am hoping with each storm I get stronger, and not weaker. I like the peaceful weather, the sun, the beautiful blue sky... no wind. Apparently, I don't grow in my life if I have good weather, but as soon as the hardship comes, I cry out to God and He is there for me to lean on. There is a song that goes somewhat like this: On darkest night, the stars shine brighter, when sorrow is close, God is even closer.

“In Him and through faith in Him we may approach God with freedom and confidence. I ask you, therefore, not to be discouraged because of my sufferings for you, which are your glory” (Ephesians 3:12-13).

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose” (Romans 8:28).

Whatever you’re facing today, keep putting your faith in Christ. Keep trusting Him that He will work all things for your good as you continue to love Him, no matter how hard it may seem at the time.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Smell the roses...


The faith of a child
The bud on a rose
The dew drop of water
The light from a star
It all points to heaven
To God who creates all!

The tears on a sinners face
The cry of the lonely heart
The voice of the soul forgiven
The whisper of a broken spirit
It all points to heaven
To a God who can heal all.

The road through the hardships
The path through the pain
The illness and sadness
The blackness filled days
It all points to heaven
To a God who is light.

The questions not answered
The dreams not fulfilled
The wishes forgotten
And promises lost
It all points to heaven
To a God who is Just!

The sunshine, the clouds
The rain in the storm
The pathway through heartache
His hand holding yours
It all points to heaven
To a God who is with us!

Is the Fathers love in you??



‘Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For everything in the world—the cravings of sinful man, the lust of his eyes and the boasting of what he has and does—comes not from the Father but from the world. The world and its desires pass away, but the man who does the will of God lives forever.’ 1 John 2:15-17


My little 2 year old is feverish today… so I am staying home and making her feel comfortable as best as can be, but she is cranky… so I am not sure if it is her fever that is making her feel cranky or just her age? Probably both.

I was thinking lately on what makes a person a Christian, or what the difference is between two people, when one person is a Christian and the other not, how can someone else know for sure who is who? Have you thought about it? I have, and I wonder what are those things that pinpoint me and you to someone who is not a Christian. I know for a fact that we as people don’t like to stand out, we want to fit in, and not be noticed for something we do, say, or wear… right? Like following fashion, everyone follows it, some more then others. We all try to look stylish, and no one wants to be caught wearing out of style clothes or shoes. I know when I go shopping its like what is the most flatering shirt I can find? Well, in my budget, but still what is stylish and will compliment my looks… and all the women I know are the same way. Young or old, we are mostly the same. Is it ok for a Christian female to follow the trend someone in Hollywood establishes as fashionable and follow it? Is it ok for us females to wear tightly snug jeans, that makes our butts look smaller, or is it ok to wear a see through blouse where our bras are visible? Hey I like wearing my jeans just like you, but I wonder if God cares in what we wear. Also about our hairstyles, I bought the latest hairstyle magazine, on how the stars have their hair in the latest trend or style. A lot of those very famous stars are not Christians, so I believe its not right for me to look up the her and copy her hair, make mine just like hers. Why would I want to copy a style from this evil world. It all comes down what is in our hearts, what are we trying to accomplish when we wear a certain piece of clothing or wear our hair in a certain style. Are we trying to feel better about our bodies, ourselves, or to uplift our self-esteem?

When in reality we should be looking how to bring grace and how to glorify God through our lives. Something to think about? Its hard to glorify God through my life, I need to either follow his footsteps, or follow the path of the ungodly. I know God loves everyone, all the ungodly and all the sinners, but he hates the sin, the ungodly things. One of my friends wrote about having a choice and choosing life or death? We always have a choice to choose what ever we want. To live our lives how ever we want, for ourselves, or for God.

'Life is more than food, and the body more then clothes.’ Luke 12:23

‘I also want women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God.’ 1 Timothy 2:9
So you see, its not me preaching it’s the word of God….:)

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Sorrel soup.


Sometimes my life is so blah.... nothing seems interesting, or fun... my moods turn for the worse, and I could be difficult to live with. Hey, I admit that I could be a pain somewhere. Usually I try to see the positives of everything, try to be cheerful, and content. Some days it is just not possible. Either the kids are too cranky and wild, or my hubby is in his daily church commitments, and not home for me to lean on. Some days the sun is not shining, or it is too bright for my tired eyes. I try to pray, I try to read the bible. Sometimes I cant. Sometimes I want to run away from my life, from all the problems and struggles.

I went to see my doctor today for my first physical. Never had one before. It wasn't too bad. My blood pressure was low. Doctor wants to do some fasting labs tomorrow, to re-check the results I had when I was pregnant with my 3rd little girl. I will try to remember not to eat breakfast, or drink my coffee tomorrow morning.

With working full time, I try to simplify my life. Less things = less mess, less for me to clean up. Cook bigger portions, so we can have left-overs the next day.

Like yesterday I made a sorrel soup, with onion, potatoes, and carrots. With a hard boiled egg. We had that with tuna melt sandwiches. I wish I had a digital camera to show you the final results.
Boil sliced up potatoes in water, or chicken stock. Stir-fry shredded carrot, and onion in some olive oil until golden brown. Add chopped sorrel, carrot, onion mixture to the cooked potatoes. There should be enough liquid in the pot with all the veggies cooking to make a nice soup consistency. Add salt, black pepper to taste. Before serving, chop up a hard boiled egg into the bowl, and add a tablespoon of sour cream on top. Sprinkle some fresh herbs, like dill or parsley. Enjoy...

Today, I boiled some potatoes in skins, steamed broccoli and served them in a butter, garlic sauce. Tomorrow we can still have left-over sorrel soup, with grilled cheese sandwiches, and I also have chicken breasts de-frosting, to fry some chicken patties. For dessert we have store bought cookies, ice cream, or fruit. My hubby bought some beautiful apricots, and they are delicious. Again, too bad I don't have a digital camera, I bet you would have enjoyed the color of these beauties. Talking about food sure cheers me up, he he?? Lets talk about a chocolate cake, and I will start singing.... :))

The weather is lovely this evening, and even though I am home without my husband again, at least I have my 3 little girls with me to keep me company. I wish you a cheerful evening. Sorry about the glum beginning.

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Sunday morning. Lets pray....


Life for the Christian is a dialogue with God.
J. H. Oldham


I woke up to a bright sunshine, and my toddler yelling “mommy” as she was trying to open her door. That’s how my Sunday started. A beautiful day, the weather crisp and fresh in the morning, the sky light blue. I let my hubby sleep in on Sundays, as I prepare breakfast and play with the kids. I took a walk outside to look at my plants. My garden needs watering, the flower bed needs weeding. The tomato plants are heavy with fruit, green and round. My basil leaf finally started to grow, it will probably start to flower one of these days. The cucumber plants are growing taller everyday, and under nit all the clinging leaves are yellow flowers, where the tiny cucumbers are starting to appear. I am so amazed by the different types of plants, and their characteristics, it just shows how amazing our God is. He made every plant so unique, even the basic tomato, it has so many different varieties. I have about 6 different tomatoes growing in my yard. The tiny yellow pear ones, the tiny red round ones, the big juicy tomatoes, and the ones that look like a large plum. Growing my own vegetables is sure a new experience to me, thanks to my mother-in-law, I believe the garden will produce something we will be able to eat soon.

I went to church yesterday with my family. Listened to a nice sermon, while trying to keep my kids quiet. I enjoy hearing interesting ways of simple verses from the bible, it seems like every time I read or hear a certain verse, it opens up more and more to me. It is a living word, so that is not surprising. The sermon was about praying often and constantly. The Muslims in their religion have certain times when they pray, where ever they are, they stop what ever they are doing and pray. We as Christians sometimes forget to pray. To talk to our heavenly father. Imagine your child growing up and calling you only like once a week, would that satisfy you? Will that be a close relationship? We are Gods children, and he wants to hear from us daily, constantly… about our fears, problems, sadness, happiness, about everyday life. We need to thank him for everything he does for us. For the beauty that surrounds us. I had the pleasure of being by the ocean last week, and it was so awesome, so powerful, so amazing. God created the big blue ocean and the white sand. He created me and you, and gave us our precious children. He is amazing. He is worth our praise, and our prayers every hour of our life. (well maybe at least 3 times daily?)

For He Himself is our peace, who has made the two one and has destroyed the barrier, the dividing wall of hostility.... He came and preached peace to you who were far away and peace to those who were near” (Ephesians 2:11a, 12-14, 17)

From one man He [God] made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and He determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live. God did this so that men would seek Him and perhaps reach out for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us” (Acts 17:26-27)

Friday, June 12, 2009

Grumble and complain.




What is the baby telling you? I dont like this, not one minute :)

It's easy to complain about how things are in your family, or how they are at work or at church or at school. But complaining won't change a thing. Neither will condemning or criticizing or preaching. What is needed where you are is someone who will be what they wish others would be - to lead by contagious example. (A passage from Gospel.com)


Is it OK to complain? Is it OK to grumble? To walk around upset, unhappy or depressed? Is that what God wants for my life? To be like a gray raining cloud, or a happy, warm sunshine? I know that a lot of people say that if I never complain, no one will ever know if its hard or troubling for me. That everyone has a right to complain, no one expects me to be strong and unbending. But then others tell me that its not right to complain, that God gives everyone according to their strength, and that nothing that happens in life is too heavy a burden. I wonder if there is a thin line between complaining and stating your burdens or troubles?
I believe if I am telling someone about my troubles, or hurts, or the heaviness of my heart it OK. For example if I say things like, I feel sad, I feel overwhelmed, I feel out of breath, that is OK to say. Or if I need help. But it gets into complaining field, when I start saying things like, I am always sad, I am tired of this weather, I don’t like anyone today, I am sick and tired of everything. I don’t like my car, I don’t like my house, my yard. When I start saying things like that, then I am in a grumbling zone, and God doesn't like it.

Am I getting this straight? I am getting confused myself. I wonder what the bible says about this?
Israel complained and was punished when they were going through the wilderness. God despised the grumblings, murmurings. Not being happy with everything they had.

Now the people complained about their hardships in the hearing of the LORD, and when he heard them his anger was aroused. Then fire from the LORD burned among them and consumed some of the outskirts of the camp. (Numbers 11:1)

In this desert your bodies will fall—every one of you twenty years old or more who was counted in the census and who has grumbled against me. (Numbers 14:29)

"Therefore I will not keep silent; I will speak out in the anguish of my spirit, I will complain in the bitterness of my soul. (Job 7:11)

You see, while Job complained in the bitterness of his soul, it was OK to do so, while Israel complained and was punished. I want to walk this fine line of complaining, and not grumble or murmur.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

My trip to Oregon


I am back from my little family vacation. I went to see my sister in Oregon, and then we took a little drive with all my 3 girls down to the ocean, where the kids played in the sand, I took pictures, amazed by the awesome beauty of water, rocks, sand, waves, seagulls, and seashells. The kids played with their beach balls, filled buckets with sand, built slouching sand castles, and run scared from the crushing waves. The drive to Oregon where green forest-filled mountains rise. Where everything is green and wet. Where the sky is always changing with clouds, and sunshine is a rare gift. It was so beautiful. I always knew I loved the mountains, but this trip really installed it in me.

It was nice to see all my relatives and friends. My cousin got married to a beautiful bride. The wedding was lovely, my aunt cried giving her firstborn son away to marriage. Even I got emotional imagining my little girl growing up and being a bride. How scary!

Driving back home to California was exhausting, the kids were tired and cranky. At first California looked yellow and flat compared to Oregon, but then the orchards of olive trees, orange trees, and cherry trees made everything lovely again. We passed through vineyards, through fields of sunflowers, and fields of corn.
I am glad to be home now. To rest and sleep in my own comfy bed. Glad not to be sharring my bedroom with my kids, except the baby who is still a nursing infant. :))